On February 25th, 1978 the 3rd episode in Season 7 aired. It was called "Make Me a Perfect Murder" and Trish Van Devere did her best to live up to the title.
📺Watch it for free, here: Watch Columbo, Season 7 | Prime Video (amazon.com). (May not be available in all regions)
The episode starred Trish Van Devere as ambitious TV executive Kay Freestone. Laurence Luckinbill played her boss (and lover) Mark MacAndrews who seals his fate by failing to promote her.
What to watch for
A few things I found interesting about the episode.
A rare early entrance
This episode features a Columbo rarity - we see the good Lieutenant right from the start - even before we meet the murderer or the victim. The episode opens with an odd little scene of Columbo singing while driving somewhat carelessly down the street, then getting into a car accident with multiple police cars that were engaged in a priority response.
This creates one of the few themes of levity in this otherwise sort of dark episode, by putting Columbo in a neck brace for most of the episode.
Does HR need to get involved?
In scene 2 we meet Kay Freestone as she's directing the dubbing of "The Professional". The scene established that she's a take-charge boss lady. However, at the end of the scene she's giving an unsolicited shoulder massage to an uncomfortable looking male sound technician. If the roles had been reversed and it was a male exec rubbing a female staff member that would have been kinda creepy.
Bit of beefcake
Speaking of awkward massages, this episode also features the only time in the series that we see Columbo with his shirt off.
Welcome back?
Even though IMDB disagrees, the CNC building looks a LOT like the airport terminal from Season 3's Swan Song to me.
Speaking of which...
Also welcome back to Patrick O'Neal, who we last saw way back in Season 1's Blueprint for Murder. In that one he was murdering Bo Williamson, in this one he's the network executive, Frank Flanagan.
Ok, ok, we get it, he's in New York
They certainly weren't subtle about the fact that Flanagan was based in New York. Practically every reference to him included a reminder of that fact. It was a bit heavy-handed, I thought, to put a snowstorm in the window behind him during the telephone scene, though.
Don't taunt the killer
Mark all but hands her the loaded gun after breaking her heart about the job situation. Turns out to be a bad idea.
James McEachen appears
It's great to see James McEachen re-appear in Columbo. We last saw him in the Season 2 opener, Etude in Black (acolumboblog.blogspot.com). Here he plays Walter Mearhead, the projectionist. I didn't love the over-the-top way he explained the changeover process to Kay in scene 8, but I get that the audience may not understand it, even though Kay clearly does.
Also, this was a 2-hour episode, and they left a lot of stuff in that they might have otherwise cut in the interest of filling time.
The last of Lally
This episode was the final appearance of the legendary Michael Lally on screen in Columbo. He has an uncredited role as the security guard who almost ruins Kay's plan by pausing to look at a girlie magazine in the lobby when she's trying to get back to the projection room after killing Mark.
...by the way, what business keeps a girlie magazine on the table in the waiting room?
An eye for an eye
Notice in the long scene when Columbo meets Kay in Mark's office that he makes a few jokes about eyes - that when he was a kid his mother said everything was bad for your eyesight. Falk himself, of course, had a glass eye. So it felt like a bit of an inside joke.
A homage to Judy Garland?
The Valerie Kay character feels like an homage to Judy Garland. A legendary song and dance star who descended into substance abuse before ultimately dying early. In this episode the director, Luther, makes a comment about Valerie realizing it's not an MGM sound stage from 20 years ago... Lainie Kazan (who is excellent in this episode) would have been about 35 years old when this show was filmed. So 20 years earlier she'd have been 15...a teen actress, just like Garland was.
Van Devere tells Valerie "You can keep the key to my apartment." That's an interesting statement and leads to some speculation that maybe the two of them were more than just friends.
Another odd moment is in scene 23 when Valerie is having her substance-induced meltdown at Kay's apartment. Kay goes to take her arm and Valerie pulls away exclaiming "Don't you touch me, I don't want to." What doesn't she want to do? Does she think the move is amorous?
Trish Van Devere is 1 year older than Kazan, so the characters certainly would have been peers, and could have been lovers. But on TV in the 1970s it might have been a bit too far to be more explicit than that.
Time killer in the booth
While Kay is trying to talk Valerie down in the dressing room, Columbo goes to the control room for a scene that is almost entirely filler to help the episode get to 2 hours. A few thoughts on this one...
John Furlong is not George C. Scott
Every now and then somebody theorizes that the TV tech in this scene is Trish Van Devere's real-life husband, George C. Scott. Though there is a bit of resemblance, it's not him. In fact, it's veteran TV actor John Furlong.
The endless fantasia scene
Probably the weakest scene in the episode is where Columbo spends nearly 2 minutes playing with buttons while simple geometric shapes dance on the screens and music plays. It feels much longer than it actually is...but it's plenty long.
You can go home again
In scene 17 Kay goes back to her childhood home. The scene is dark, and serious, and sort of keeps in theme with this episode. Nobody in the episode seems happy - there's a lot of tension - and a lot of the key scenes are filmed at night or indoors in dull lighting.
There's a nice moment at the beginning of the scene where Kay has wandered into the kitchen, then suddenly notices the neck brace on the counter. Her first indication that Columbo is there too.
Before Kay sits and notices it the camera is looking through what appears to be a broken window...and the crossbar of the frame blocks the very spot on the counter where the neck brace is.
Notice that when Columbo starts to suggest that she had motive to kill Mark, she stops the massage and walks back to her side of the table. But when he reassures her that he doesn't think she could have done it, she walks back and resumes the massage.
All in the family
During the chat with Kay, Columbo mentions that he has 5 brothers and a sister. This is chit-chat with a suspect - and one who grew up with siblings - so we can't have a lot of confidence in that claim. He might have just been trying to build rapport with the suspect.
...but Mrs. Columbo...
In the very next scene, however, Columbo mentions Mrs. Columbo, and his brother-in-law, to Sgt. Burke when no suspects are in earshot. It's a weird little scene (more filler, most likely, even seems like it might have been improvised) but further establishes that Mrs. Columbo was real. There's no reason for him to invent her for Sgt. Burke's benefit, and possible that Sgt. Burke (as a coworker) might know Columbo well enough to know if he's married.
Later in the episode Columbo mentions Mrs. Columbo to the TV repair guy (played by Columbo occasional Bruce Kirby). Again, no suspects are around and there's no reason for Columbo to lie to a random TV repair guy about being married.
Kay makes guesses
Mark's evaluation of Kay seems to be proven right. She presses forward with the Valerie Kay show, despite the fact that everybody (including Valerie) tells her it's not going to work.
Then she substitutes The Professional for the Valerie Kay show when it has to be a last-minute scratch. Maybe she didn't have anything else available, but running a violent spy thriller in place of a family variety show is a strange choice, likely to put off a lot of audience members who would have tuned in expecting song and dance.
Just a few more things
- Lot of really good performances in this. Van Devere is terrific, brought home by her shaking hands and frantic attempts to evade Columbo at the end, when she's been fired and knows she's caught.
- Appropriately, there's a cue blip on the screen when Columbo turns off the studio equipment at the very end.
- A big part of the gotcha is planting the fake gun for Kay to retrieve. Notice that they blocked the other elevator car with the cleaning cart to force Kay into the elevator they needed her to be in.
- If the delivery guy from the dry cleaner looks familiar, it's apparently Paul Willson...who is better known as one of "The Bobs" in the movie Office Space.
- Dog makes a rare appearance in this one too - though only briefly when they go to the TV repair shop.
Plot holes
There are a couple of issues I have with this one.
Maybe he was asleep
The clue with the glasses, that MacAndrews had to know his killer because he never pulled his glasses down sounds good until you realize...he was laying on the couch. Maybe he was asleep when he was shot.
The projection timer
Apparently, Kay messed with the projection timer to try and fake when she made the changeover...but that doesn't hold much water. The reels end where they end, the timer is just for the projectionist's convenience. It would be pretty easy to figure out when Kay ACTUALLY made the changeover - that's just math.
Why is the gun still there?
In that first "morning after" scene when the police are investigating the scene Columbo says that they think the gun is still on the premises. But why? If the killer left the building, wouldn't they have taken the gun with them?
I suppose if Columbo's argument is that the killer had to be still in the building because the security was too tight for them to get out, then I suppose that makes sense, but still felt like a reach to me.
Denying the relationship
Likewise, it seemed futile for her to deny that she and Mark had a relationship. Even before the car got delivered a decent investigation would have revealed that Mark had recently bought a Mercedes and registered it in Kay's name.
Wrap-up
All in all, it's not my favorite episode. The gotcha feels a little forced and the whole episode is just a bit dark. The neck brace setup and schtick seemed a little weird, and there's way too much filler. Maybe as a tighter 90-minute episode it would have worked better.
The performances by Van Devere, Luckinbill, and the rest of the cast hold it up, but it won't make my top 10.
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